This was our last day in Barbados — or rather fraction of a day. We had to leave for the airport at 1pm, so aside from the little time we spent on the beach, we walked 10 minutes to a nearby mall. In the following photo, my mom is wearing the straw hat and my half-sister Martha is just ahead of her:

Did you notice the guy wearing the Yankees cap? I saw at least a dozen of those (not all red) on people’s heads during my time in Barbados. Not once did I see anyone wearing Mets gear.
The walk to the mall provided beautiful glimpses like this…
…but also forced us to navigate forgettable stretches like this:
Holetown clearly wasn’t built with pedestrians in mind.
Once we reached the mall, we found our way into a huge department store/gift shop. Martha and my mom bought a bunch of souvenirs for friends and family. The only thing I got was a snazzy T-shirt for myself. (That’s how I roll. I think gifts are stupid. I haaaaaate receiving them and rarely give them.) Check it out in the photo below, and while you’re at it, note the hair-hand on the back on my head:
The funny moment of the day happened after we left the store. We stopped in a little restaurant for a drink/snack, and one of the things we got was a “guava turnover.” Here’s a photo of it:
The woman behind the counter asked if we wanted it warmed up.
“Sure,” I said, “thanks, but not too hot. Just slightly warm.”
Unbeknownst to us, she heated it up so much that the cheesy-guava center became thermonuclear. Martha took the first bite, but only got a taste of the edge. In other words, she didn’t get any of the hot stuff.
“Good call on getting it warm,” she said.
I then took a bite that caused the filling to ooze out and burn the corner of my mouth.
“Damn!!” I said as Martha prepared to take another bite. “It’s really hot! Watch out.”
Martha must not have believed me because she took a HUGE bite of the center, which scalded her mouth and sprayed everywhere and dripped on her hand and burned her skin. She shrieked and spat it out and flailed her arms — and it was one of the funniest things I’ve had the pleasure of witnessing in quite some time. Meanwhile, my mom grabbed her camera and took a pic of me laughing. It’s not a particularly attractive photograph (in part because my mouth was still full), but here you go:
Here’s a photo of the guava turnover immediately after:
It was still unbelievably hot, so I named the center filling “guava lava.” Even Martha, who was nonchalantly cleaning herself off at that point…
…had to laugh. I can already tell that 
“guava lava” will be a source of hilarity for years to come. My family tends to hang onto ridiculous/funny things forever. We’re still joking about a “short stack” of pancakes from a diner in Arizona in 1997, if that’s any indication. Long story. Don’t ask.
My mom went back to the condo after that, and Martha and I headed to a supermarket in another mall. While she checked out the rum…
…I picked up a couple more bottles of my new favorite drink:
Actually, the stuff is nasty, but I wanted to bring some back to New York City because…you never know when it might come in handy.
It was time to leave for the airport. Martha took one last look at the ocean… 
…and then our taxi arrived:
There weren’t many food options at the airport, so I settled on this place:
Doesn’t look all that special, right? Well, look at my outstanding meal below. I got a fillet of grilled “jerk” trout (which was VERY spicy) with pumpkin rice and a fried sweet plantain:
Sooooo good. The long doughy thing next to the rice was a soft/fried bread stick. As I tweeted earlier today, I somehow managed to lose weight on this trip. I mean, I did my share of exercising, but still, there were several meals when I ate like a madman.
We were supposed to have a direct flight back to JFK, but as I tweeted late last night, there was a sick passenger on the plane (she had a seizure and needed heart medication), so we had to make an emergency landing in Bermuda. On the way down, I took the following photo of the sunset:
We were told that we’d only be on the ground for 20 minutes, so we weren’t allowed to get off the plane, but then of course the 20 minutes turned into three hours. How nice.
You’ve probably noticed by now that I like to photograph everything. The cab ride back from the airport was no exception. Here’s a semi-blurry photo of Martha (sitting closer to me) and my mom:
I didn’t want to use the flash (because it screws up the gentl
e natural light), so I had to try extra hard to hold the camera steady.
Here’s where it gets cool…
Check out this shot I took of our view as we sped down the highway:
I was using a function on my camera called “continuous mode.” I basically held down the button and it took a pic or two every second. When I went to turn it off, I noticed that I’d accidentally taken a bonus shot at the end — and since I had been moving my camera at the time, everything came out blurry and crazy and awesome:
The photo above is NOT photoshopped. That was just a natural effect of moving the camera while taking a photo in very low light, and it gave me an idea: what if I zoomed all the way in on the meter and took pics without trying to hold the camera steady?
The result was trippy and gorgeous…
…and I took a bunch more photos just like it:
This is how I entertain myself. I photograph EVERYTHING. I’ll happily go a week without turning on my cell phone, but if I have to go an hour without my camera, I’ll start to freak out.
The End.
(Forty-two days until my book comes out…)


I love the “Guava Lava” story. Hilarious. The photos of the cab meter are AWESOME. Amazing how an accident can turn into something great. (Potato chips fall under that category.) I am the same way when it comes to taking pictures. (I once took nearly 200 pictures at a single baseball game.)

that first cab picture looks like the light speed thing from star wars

I took a couple pictures similar to your clock pictures last year in the parking lot after a game in Philadelphia. The crazy thing is that Tim and I are in focus while all of the lights in the background are going crazy. Check it out:

Damn, two hundred pics is a lot. I’ll sometimes that many at a single event, but I rarely keep them all.

Good call.

That’s pretty wild. I like Tim’s funny face in the pic on the upper right.

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